Yeah Nah Yeah
From backyard ideas to big-picture thinking, honesty, curiosity, a bit of humour, some swear words and a kiwi accent. Tune in for grounded yet unhinged conversations, fresh perspectives, and yarn’s worth having (maybe).
Yeah Nah Yeah
E16 - Bust A Nut For Humanity
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Space X rocket hits the moon and colonising the moon. Buying shit we don't need and declining birth rates.
This weeks Fuck That's Funny: A throw back to CJ's past.
Hello What the fuck? These are getting worse. Hello and welcome to the Year Na Ye podcast. It's me, your old mate CJ. How are we all today? Welcome to another fucking week. Or if you're listening to this on a Sunday like Phil will be, um I've hope you've had a great week and some good stuff and things happened to you. And um yeah. Fuck yeah, we're one week closer to summer, everybody in the Southern Hemisphere. And um you're one week closer to winter if you're in the Northern Hemisphere. So I'm just out here spreading the good news for everybody. Um can't be having too much fun, eh? Too much summer vibes in the Northern Hemisphere. Um yeah, one week fucking closer. One week I'm one week closer to my new job as well, fam. Fuck, I can't believe it. I've had some mixed feelings, mixed emotions about that actually. Had a little bit of a cry this week because I'm a little bit sad to leave people that I've I've grown to well not even grown, but grown to like l oh fuck, what's the words? Like I I appreciate hanging out with my workmates and fuck. Yeah, I'm starting again. It's gonna be weird, but it's also gonna be good. And I went to Nelson this weekend just for a day trip, quick, quick fucking in and out trip, did some shopping, got some new clothes, got a new hair straightener, slash curler, fucking some new meal prep containers, and yeah. I'm ready to hit the ground running in this new this new role, in this new um place that I'm gonna be working at. But yeah. Fucking also, I got bought a fucking squishy, or whatever the fuck you call them. Those little things, like, they're like foam, and they're like squishy and like amazing, and these are fucking bomb. Like these are like one of the best fucking inventions. So my auntie is an upholsterer, and um, and I'd go into her work and her and uh me and my cousin actually, and we go in and like squish this bit of memory foam, and I said said at one point in time, like, I'm gonna need like a s little square of this just to like have in my pocket because it was just so fucking satisfying. And this squishy is that, and also it smells fucking delicious. I don't know why, but yeah, it smells like um like coconut ice or something. I chucked away the the little fucking um thing, so I don't know what it actually smells like, but yeah. Fucking brilliant. What a great invention. I watched a um did I tell you guys about that? Can't remember. Can't rem can't even remember what the fuck I said in the last episode, but um yeah, I watched a thing on ADHD and that um fidgeting's real good, so for people with ADHD, it's a um episode on TVNZ, and it's with Guy Williams, who for anybody who doesn't know who's not from New Zealand, um, he's like a famous comedian here, and yeah, they did brain scans, and fucking turns out that for people with ADHD, uh it helps with brain functionality or brain fucking it turns your brain on anyways. It turns your brain on more if you fidget. So fuck's sakes, I've been told wrong my whole life, eh? Like fucking sit still like fucking Yeah, now I can be like, what, you just want me to turn my fucking brain off? Like turn my brain off a little bit? Alright, sweet ass. Um but yeah, what a what a life hack. What a life hack the fidgeting. Um yeah, so anyways, fucking I saw that SpaceX, one of their little rockets, um well I don't know if it was little, but one of their rockets fucking flew into the moon, eh? What the fuck is that about? What the fuck is that about? Just we've got in 2026 we've got fucking rockets flying into the moon. I don't think that's a good thing. Like, I might be crazy here, but I don't think rockets hitting the moon is kind of like in the basket of that's okay. But anyway, who who the who the fuck am I to talk? Like, I'm not a trillionaire and um I'm not a space scientist or whatever the fuck you call those peoples. Um But yeah, I looked into I ended up looking into Elon Musk a little bit and I forgot actually that his whole thing is like colonizing Mars. Like and I'm not too sure. At the start when they were saying about yeah, colonizing Mars, rah rah rah, I was like, oh yeah. Like that sounds kind of fucking cool. And at the time I was like, I actually will volunteer as tribute because fuck this planet. But I'm actually quite enjoying living on this planet, and yeah, I don't know why we need to be colonizing other planets, but um I don't know. Like, isn't it just fucking dusty there? Like, yeah, what are we gonna do on like a ball of dust? We've got a ball with like rivers and mountains and snow and well fucking maybe not snow for much longer if like if global warming like carries on the way it's carried on, but yeah, fuck. Why do we wanna go to Mars? I don't know, I don't fucking know. Anyways, I don't feel like we're doing a particularly great job on our own planet, like and I think actually if there's like a bucket, if there's like a bucket and like they're putting in names and shit, like I'll probably fling in a couple of names of some people that it would probably be best for humanity if they went to Mars. Like I'll volunteer them as tributes. I'm sure we've all got some of those names that would go in the bucket, eh? Do you reckon? Yeah. Oh, I've definitely fucking got a few. But um, yeah. It's weird, eh? What the what the fuck is the future gonna look like? On that topic, I um started a book uh that's called The End of the World Is Just the Beginning by Peter Zihan, I'm pretty sure is how you say his last name. Z-E-I-H-A-N. And um yeah, The End of the World is just the beginning, the end of globalization, and fuck it's interesting. Oh my gosh, what a fucking interesting book. Also fucking terrifying, like did start to spin me out a little bit, like the same as what the news can be like at times, and literally why I don't fucking watch the news much, apart from what little pops up on my Facebook page and what I hear through the grapevine. But um, yeah, fuck. It literally it starts it starts off where he's talking about like the start of farming and how people would collect human feces for fertilizer for fertilizer to farm. Disgusting, like that's fucking disgusting, but that was kind of like the start of farming and um and then it talks about like how the mill was created and then windmills and then like they fucking transport transported on the sea and then like transporting on the roads and then the bigger fucking ships and trucks and holy shit and the free trade agreement it's it's amazing. Like if you want to fucking check it out, I would highly recommend it. It's on Spotify, I'm not too sure where else it's available, but um yeah. And there was a part in there about like um fucking birth rates, and it's funny because our government here in New Zealand has just started talking about it. Like in uh was it f is it fucking Winnie, like Winston Peters that said they were gonna give give people like fucking f $15,000 or something for every baby? Fuck like mate, honestly, I'd probably fucking kids are expensive though, you know, like fifteen thousand dollars sounds real good but in the grand scheme of things children are like seem to be for the elite and dogs seem to be like for people that you know probably would have had kids if it was cheaper. But yeah, fucking that it's the finances, man. Finances and it was also talking about how cities and like not having big farms and stuff, like how people are in apartment buildings and that and how so that's reduced the number of pe people having children and the amount of children that can be had. It also fucking cracked me up. It also said about how on the like back in the farming days, how like you'd have families on farms and that, that they'd have big families because kids, once you raise them to a certain age, meant free labour. Yeah, fucking it makes so much sense, but fuck it cracks me up. I just thought it's because they didn't have TVs back in those days. Like, I think there's probably a few contributing factors that and like ke contraception and all that sort of stuff, but yeah, I was looking into it and I was looking at the um the birth rates of places like South Korea, so this is the replacement rates, okay? So it takes like what is it, like two, two point something or other to replace the population that we've currently got. And so these places are replacing at these rates. South Korea is at 0.75, Puerto Rico is at 0.92 Singapore 0.97 Ukraine 0.99. Oh, these aren't all numbers from last year's birth rates, by the way. So la or maybe this year's? I can't remember. It was off fucking Wikipedia, so it might not be completely accurate. But Ukraine, I can understand. People aren't going to be wanting to reproduce when their country is in an active fucking war. That makes sense to me. That's really fucking sad. But yeah. Um Malta 1.01 China 1.01 British Virgin Islands 1.05. I'm actually surprised at that for like a um for an island of virgins that they're even getting one on the board. But yeah, there's some people that aren't obviously living up to the country's name. They're bro, there's some rules being broken on the Virgin Islands for them to be having a birth rate of 1.05. Um, yeah. So like I can't remember where New Zealand was at. I think we were at 1.64. So we've also dropped below replacement level. But fuck. Instead of giving us $1,500 fucking dollars to have one child, how about fix the cost of living pro crisis? How about like not having uh when I was in Todonga, uh, how about not having a median house price of $850 fucking thousand dollars? Or no, maybe it was six hundred. Mmm. Either way, fucking too much. Too much fucking money, okay? So yeah, just how about like how and that that would that would help everybody like everybody in the country, not just like the people who like it are okay to have children, because some people can't have fucking children as well, and that's not their fault. So did they get fifteen thousand dollars for adopting a child too? Like, yeah. Cause some people might just start spitting kids out and adopt them out, and then what the actual fuck. So I don't know. I don't know. Anyways, it doesn't s it doesn't sound like a particularly good plan to me, but you never know. And then I think Luxon was talking about fucking what was it, 1,000 babies will now be signed up to KiwiSaver and they'll get $1,000 in their KiwiSaver account, like on the day that they're born. And I can't help but feel that I don't know if you guys have seen the movie In Time, but um like it's this this movie with Justin Timber, like it's one of my fucking favourite movies. Um, but like they've got this clock on their wrist, and the clock is their currency, and it's like it's time. So if their clock goes to zero, they die. So they pretty much have to get all like this extra time and all that sort of stuff. And um but the kids until they get to an age of I can't remember how fucking old, they've got like a year of time, and I think some people are living like week to week in terms of time, and um they like they want to use the this year that's like sitting on their kids' fucking um like on their kids' clock on their arms. But yeah, so it's it just made me think it's it's we're living in a fucking dystopian fucking film at this point, eh? Like a sci-fi fucking horror a little bit. Um when I start This is why I don't fucking watch the news or listen to any of that stuff, because it makes me fucking sick. It makes me fucking sick, but it is this whole thing of like um what does he call it? Industrialization. That like we're not living in small fucking tribes and colonies or whatever anymore. Like we are somebody actually put it the other day, it's like was it neo neo fucking slavery or something like that? I can't remember what they what they called it, but yeah, we're practically I feel like it's an illusion, man, like that we are actually free and in control of our own lives. Because people are now gonna be struggling that bad and they're like, well, we're just gonna start spitting out kids because there's a fifteen no, well, that's if this person gets into parliament, you know. But because there's like a fifteen thousand dollar incentive, well that's not choice. That's not choice when we're already kept at this level where we're fucking struggling because of the cost of living crisis, and then you dangle a carrot to make us do what you want us to do. It's fucked. That's fucked. And that's probably why this this podcast will probably never go anywhere because of that sort of shit that I see and I will say, but um oh yeah. Anyway, fucking hell. That brings me to on that real positive fucking note. Oh my goodness. Yeah. On the topic of that, I fucking saw this guy on like fucking money and cost of living crisis and shit. I saw this video just today, actually, and it was this guy, this guy with this speaker, and I think he had like a red bucket actually, and I think he was like dragging one leg a little bit in New York City, and he had this microphone, and he was like, To the guy with the dog, um, I don't mean any offense by this or something along the lines of this. And I was expecting like this guy with a fucking actual dog, but um this person that's recording looking yeah, zooms out a little bit, and it's this guy with this fucking robot dog, and this guy was saying about like um he's like, imagine how many homeless you could have fed with that. Like he was like spending thir was it 1300 or 30 $13,000 on a do on a robot dog. Yeah, imagine how many homeless you could have fed with that, and then he carries on to say, like, in America we waste we waste money on bullshit. And then he's as he's like walking off, because he's like cracking up laughing and shit as well. He's like, they're always trying to sell us some bullshit, and I'm like, that's so fucking true, man. That's so fucking true. Like, we're always trying like somebody's trying to fucking feed us some bullshit. There's a Hobo Johnson song that's like um Facebook and um YouTube got the tubes in my mouth, and as they generously feed me my ads for the day, for the week, for the month. I think that's fucked such a fucking tune. I think the song's called I Want You Back by Hobo Johnson, if you want to go check that out. But I just I fucking love that. I love that little line. Facebook and YouTube got their tubes in my mouth, or something along the lines. Um But yeah, it I also the other last weekend I was watching a tiny tiny desk concert, Mac Miller's Tiny Desk top concert, and he has this song 2009, and there's a lyric in there, we buy a lot of things just to feel a lot of ugly. I'm just gonna let that sink in for a little bit. We buy a lot of things just to feel a lot of ugly. Yeah. Fucking it's fucking deep. It's fucking deep. And oh, I think uh did did freaking um did car was it Kanye or something? Oh when it oh falls down Yeah, I think I think actually fuck did he say that first. Yeah, we buy a lot of things, just feel a lot of ugly. Yeah, maybe that that's ringing bells, maybe not. Um, but it did make me think that like when are we gonna fucking realize? I think some people are waking up. Yeah, I think some people are waking up, but like when will we realize as a society the outside things that we buy will not make us whole or fill the inner gnawing we have like Yeah. I think when we realise that, when we s wake up to the propaganda and the fucking bullshit that they're trying to sell us, that we might be a step closer to the answers that a lot of us are actually looking for and trying to buy that next thing and tr and trying to fucking take that next drug if you're a fucking addict. Um in the next fucking, I don't know, swipe on Tinder, like the next fucking whatever. Um Yeah. And buying shit is the same as that, I guess. Like buying stuff, which I feel like a hypocrite now because I've just said about how I bought some new fucking work clothes, but shit shit guys, I can't rock up in the fucking hunting and fishing fleeces, okay? And my fucking my um steel cap gumboots. But, you know, I could, but I don't think yeah. What I what I'm what I'm trying to like put across is like when the consumerism becomes a coping mechanism for like it becomes a pseudo, like a pseudo thing, like um I'll buy these new clothes and then I'll be accepted or something. Thing, you know? Um I'll buy this new car and then I'll get all the girls or something. I don't know. Then I'll meet the person of my dreams. And it's so much deeper than that. Like when we start giving ourselves that stuff, the acceptance, this is what I'm learning, anyways, and I say learning on purpose too, because I'm still fucking learning how to practice it. But um, yeah, when we don't when we're not reliant on outside things, um yeah, when we're not fucking caught up in the rat race of like getting more money to buy more shit to feel better about ourselves or to impress people whose acceptance feels vital for our acceptance in ourselves. Um Yeah. I don't know, man. I can't remember how I started that sentence, so I don't know how to fucking finish it. But my yeah. My point is, like, fuck. I guess it ties into the like the the other topic the other week, or was that last week, of like, you're enough. You're enough. Like even if your clothes are in fucking tatters and stuff, like you're enough. Um and I've started realizing in my life, like, when I'm trying to chase things, there tends to be when I'm trying and I chase, I guess chase is like the the the most important word here is when I'm chasing things, as opposed to like waiting and letting them fucking happen in my life if they're meant to happen for me, when I'm chasing them, it tends to be coming from like a place of like ego or lack or whatever the fuck you want to call it. Um that like I need this thing to make me okay or feel safe or um feel worthy um feel beautiful, like that was that that's been one of my like self-limiting beliefs is that like I'm ugly. Um I think that's probably it for a lot of women where like man, I think of like even back in the well if fuck even as a kid, man, even as a kid, like you're watching Disney and stuff like that, and there's like these pretty girls on there, like Hannah Montana and drawing blanks here, I can't remember who else was on fucking Disney Channel. That's so Raven. Um Fuck, who was the other one? Hilary Duff. Um Yeah. Like Yeah. We've been so fucking programmed, man. We've been so programmed. Holy shit. I sound like a fucking conspiracy theorist, but like it's facts, bro. It's fucking facts. Anyways, I guess the hope is like we can all break out. And there are so many people that are breaking out and that are aware. And then I think there's like the extremists that are like, I saw some fucking things on Facebook today of like say no to drug side testing, don't let them put the fucking test in your mouth because there's chemicals on there and rah. I'm like, oh my fucking god. Honestly, what the actual fuck, this is too far now. Probably the same people that are like flat earthers, but anyways. If you are, that's okay. Like you do you boo, but I am gonna take the piss out of you right now, a little bit about that, cause fuck. Holy fuck. Um, anyways. Holy shit, I've got like five minutes to do. Fuck, that's funny. Man, this one was very serious, wasn't it? Anyways, I've just got a fucking issue with the world after reading that book. But yeah, if you want a good book to fucking go listen to, um, and probably if you're in a good mental headspace, because it could spin you out if that sort of shit spins you out like it does me. Um yeah, fucking h hit it up, hit it up. The end of the world is just the beginning, the end of globalization. Hell yeah. Anyways, do it's time for fuck that's funny. Well, holy shit, I forgot to write down anything this week and I don't feel like I was really um like super duper funny this week. I've been a little melancholy. Um But I did think about one I was gonna say about Phil's um Phil getting sucked off nearly by the train But I'll let him um tell you that properly when when he's over. One week closer to Phil getting over. Hell yeah. Um But I thought I'd fucking do a little throwback actually. So my one that I thought of thought of was back in my drunken debauchery right at like peak, drunken debauchery Casey. And um I was hanging out with with some peeps and I'm probably gonna have to fucking not say these people's actual names on here, right? Just in case this podcast does actually get anywhere. But um, let's call this guy Travis. So I used to hang out with Travis, I met Travis when I was probably about like 15 or something, and um and we were we were fucking drinking and dro w like we'd just fucking drink together. That was kind of the thing that would happen, like yeah. We'd drink together, there was a group, there was quite a wide group of us and some like cr crossover of friends and stuff, and people, yeah. Nelson, it was a very small place. But this one night we were out drinking at this guy, Travis's house, and um it's his his parents' fucking property, like real nice property, and um we're all sitting around this this little fire and he's got this fire there and it's kind of in the shape of like a maybe like a gourd with like a long top. Does a gourd have a long top? Like a butt butternut pumpkin. I don't know if fucking other places in the world have but butternut pumpkins, or maybe they call them something different. But um, yeah, fucking we're sitting there around this campfire and um and it's got a front hole and then it's got this kind of like little chimney bit off it. Well, my mate Travis thinks that it's a real good idea to get her a crank and and pour some petrol or diesel or whatever the fuck it was on there. Bearing in mind we're all steamed, okay? Like we've all been on it and we're fucking steaming. And um, yeah, he fucking ends up pouring this fucking pouring this de petrol, this fuel, on the fire, but instead of doing it, he what did tend to be a little bit of a sandwich short of a picnic at times, Travis. And um instead of pouring it into the front hole or not fucking pouring it on the fire that was already going at all, or pouring it on something else and then putting it in the fire, you fucking poured it through the chimney. And I remember watching this fucking fire just travel up the stream of fuel. Fucking and fucking Travis like freaks out, fucking chucks this jerry can or whatever the fuck you call it in other things of the world, parts of the world, like petrol can, chucks this fucking jerry can. It ends up, we're in like rur in a rural setting, okay? So there's paddocks and shit. He chucks it back, backwards, away from him. The fucking jerry can ends up in the shrub, which behind that are like fields of grass, and I have a feeling like it was, I don't know if it was summer or what, but like, yeah, fields of fucking grass. Um, I'm fucking pissing myself laughing at this point in time. Everybody's kind of like panicking, fucking cracking up at the same time at this like little just how ludicrous the whole situation is. The fucking bush is catching fire behind behind everything, which my mate Travis is real concerned about, but I'm fucking trying like I just remember being in hysterics and but I was trying to tell him your fucking hands on fire. Your fucking hands on fire for fuck's sake. Travis, your hand's on fucking fire. And anyways, the boys fucking next minute people are like scrambling, fucking trying to put this fire out. I can't remember what I'm doing. Maybe just sitting there fucking c looting my shit, just cracking up in hysterics. And um, yeah, the boys, one of the boys fucking goes and gets the gets the fucking hose out. This other guy, I'm gonna call him fucking Tim. Um yeah, so Tim, he's a country lad. Fucking he goes and gets the fucking hose. Next minute, the fucking Travis is the chick that Travis is fucking dating or rooting or whatever he was up to at the time, fucking runs out, she'd disappeared for a while, she fucking comes out. She's like running out with this fucking Pyrex ball for the water. For the fucking water For this fucking shrub for this fucking um hedge that's caught on fire by this fucking patriot cat. Oh my fucking god, the whole thing was fucking just Oh, it was so good. I that is such a fond mem memory. And to be completely honest, in Travis's missus's um defense, she was doing more than what I fucking was, because I wasn't even pouring my fucking drink on it, you know? I wasn't even like trying to fucking do anything apart from just losing the fucking plot. Yeah, fuck it was cracker. And then Travis was complaining about fucking how sore his hand was afterwards. I was like, mate, I was trying to fucking tell you the whole time that your hand was fucking on fire. Jesus Christ. Holy fuck, but yeah, anyways, the the fire got put out, the boys put the fire out, the field didn't catch on fire behind. I never actually thought about fucking Travis's fucking folks getting home. I don't think I ever asked. I wouldn't have fucking cared to be honest, but yeah, them looking out their fucking lounge window at like their hedge and it's like fucking cinched, like half fucking burnt. Oh my gosh, fuck we were losers. Oh, but funny ones though. Fuck that as cracker. Yeah, anyways, guys, holy shit. I'm uh I'm past the 30 minute mark. Um we got there, we did it. Hell yeah. Another fucking week done and dusted. I hope you guys all have a beautiful week and um yeah, fucking just remember you're fucking worth it, mate. You're worth it. You don't need the car or the fucking house or the fucking new clothes or whatever to to be enough, um, or a fucking roly or whatever you've got your eye on at the moment that you're thinking is gonna make you whole, you're enough just the way just the way you are. Uh don't listen to society saying that you need a fucking I don't know, a fucking Dyson came to mind. Um if you want all of those things and that's cool, but like as long as your worth isn't tied to those. Um and just remember fucking bust the nut for humanity this week, okay? Like shoot off a couple of fucking rounds. Um and maybe do the best you can with like selection, but I don't know if like humanity as a whole, if we're like too concerned about that, okay? We just need people in the fucking workforce. So yeah, start busting some nuts out there, guys, and um for the ladies fucking yeah, um birth control, like yeah, maybe you want to come off that too. So uh, like, yeah, fucking go do your piece. I'm not going to. Um, I'm not going to currently. But um, yeah. If you guys want to, that'd be fucking cool. Alright. Peace out, everybody. Hope you have a great week, and uh, I will you will hear me on the next one. Right, bye.